Abs of Ryan
It seems I need to change my name to Ryan. Hollywood is pushing two greek god type bodies at us who are both named Ryan (Reynolds and Gosling). It also seems I must move to Canada for that appears to be the land of the gods.
While I would love to have abs of steel, I know that now past the age of fifty this ain’t never gonna happen. You can buy the workout tapes, the potions, the underwear, the jeans, etc. but you can’t get that look without going to the gym. I have been a member of a gym. Love the hot tub. I have been on every fad diet that you can think of. I even tried that stuff that Anna Nicole was pushing. None of it is a shortcut to success and some of it can hurt you.
Maybe in another life I will look like Ryan. Maybe I will look like Anna. Who knows. But in this life time I am satisfied with who I am and while I could stand to lose some weight for health reasons I am not setting any unrealistic goals.
I am thinking about this because I am headed to Palm Springs for Labor Day. Palm Springs is where all the old gay hollywood men go to die (and some women too). It is also the home to more than a few porn stars. (These bodies are attainable for the night and a price.)
When I was a few years younger I would try to attain some level of perfection with my body. I would exercise, tan, diet. But now I am mostly thinking about where I will go to eat. Besides the best I ever achieved was skinny not god like. And it seems the young men like us old farts no matter how deteriorated we get. Probably because they are looking for dinner. So the way I see it I am a step ahead of these kids. I can afford to eat!
But still I look back fondly at my skinny self until I remember the hard times. I remember the hunger that could not be satisfied and the unmentionable things (some of which I have mentioned) I did to fill this void. I remember the drinking and the hangover (which is now largely just my gut). I remember being stupid. And in many ways I still am.
So Ryan’s of the world I salute you and your six packs. In fact, I may have a few of my own this weekend. They will be going into my body instead of being on it.
One of the Ryan’s (Guess)