Self conscious (or fear and loathing in Reno)
The new year has brought me a lot of work. I have been trying to write this post all morning and here we are in the afternoon. Be careful what you wish for….I am!
Aside from work I have managed to get back with the program diet wise. I have set a new goal for myself to be in better shape by Summer. Not that I am going anywhere in particular yet, but I have always wanted to look good with my shirt off. (Maybe that is asking for too much!) At the very least I would like to be able to tuck in a shirt and not have over hang.
As many of you have said we set these goals for ourselves and never seem to quite achieve them. Personal goals are hard. It is easier to fail ones self then to fail others. Maybe that should be a goal too. Not to fail myself anymore. Certainly I should not blame myself anymore. We achieve what we want to not what we dream of…right?
Making dreams a reality takes perseverance and fortitude. I can’t make excuses. My future is my business. Everything else should follow. It sounds selfish doesn’t it. But really it’s laziness. I can justify helping others and doing a good job at work. But when it comes to myself I let myself go. Not a good thing. If I work as hard at being a good person and having a great body as I do everything else it should be achievable. These are lofty goals, but I will try. After all, I was not born fat and ugly, I did that to myself.
While we were in Nola I realized that how I look is really more of my issue then anyone else. Most people accept me the way I am. (The ones that don’t I can pay for! Ha!) But I need to like myself, my inward and outward appearance. So I will eat less. I will go for walks and exercise. I will try to be as beautiful outside as I am in. (But what if I am ugly inside and out! Ha!) All of these things can be worked on.
Enough therapy for one afternoon. Hope everyone achieves their goals in the coming months and makes 2013 a banner year. I will try to be more entertaining an less boring tomorrow.