50 shades of Valentines….

I am not sure how a movie about a S&M couple is a good release for Valentine’s Day? Even at Baskin-Robbins (31 flavors) I end up with vanilla. Sure I might dip my cone in some chocolate on occasion. Hold on I hear a knock a the back door……it was package being delivered. Anyway,  where was I going with this…..oh yes at 54 years of age if I get one shade that is about all I can handle.


Nice Chocolate Dip

And to spare the dreaded NC-17 rating there is going to be no frontal nudity! I don’t know about you but I am waiting for the uncut dvd I can buy at Target and watch in privacy. I am thinking this movie is geared for women anyway, not me.

While we are on the subject of Valentine’s Day, let me say that I hate it. You’re supposed to buy candy, flowers, and ridiculous looking stuffed animals along with a mushy Hallmark card. If you vary from this and get something nice, it has to be really nice. That cheap heart pendent was good enough for mom but not your significant other.

Plus, going out on Valentine’s Day cost triple what it would any other night of the year. And the food is usually a prefix menu!  Ridiculous again!

I know that movies always have crossed lovers meeting at the top of the Empire State Building (hmmm with no frontal that’s not happening) or roof top dinning with a special chef.  But the reality is most of us sit at home and watch TV.

Heaven forbid you are single on V-day!  My office mate is having a singles party at his house.  Yikes!

Don’t get me wrong.  I am a hopeless romantic.  I love those sappy movies. What do you think I am watching on TV.  It’s just that we are not those people.  We are not young and beautiful and crazy in love.  We are far to practical for that.  For example, Ricky bought some flowers because we were having company.  We threw them out after two days because they are making us sneeze and have watery eyes.  Although I would love some roses for Valentine’s Day, I don’t think they are worth the money.  Maybe that is why women want them.  They are wasteful. “If he would waste that much money on flowers he must really love me!”  Bull shit (I am sorry it was either that or bite me!)


Okay!  I will admit it.  I am intrigued by what the other 49 shades are………I am not saying I want to try them out but I could watch.


Maybe this is more your cup of tea?

One Response to “50 shades of Valentines….”

  1. I love the notion of 50 shades of earl gray!

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